Kurt Metzger used to be a Jehovah’s Witness. “Knock knock! Who’s There? It’s Kurt Metzger, motherfucker!” he could be heard to shout, shambling from door to door at six a.m. on many a cold Sunday morn! After getting involved in a bloody turf war with some Mormons, Kurt decided to say “goodbye” to the God game and “hello” to the dropping out of college to become a standup comic game. Thereby disappointing his parents in a profound way on many different levels. Besides regularly performing in many an NYC comedy club, his credits include writing for Chappelle’s Showon Comedy Central, writing for some VH1 shows no one saw, performing at the 2004 “Just For Laughs” Montreal Comedy Festival, and writing for Cracked Magazine.