August 22, 2016
EP. 138 — 8 Fictional Schools That Would Be Awesome To Go To
So after seven books, eight movies and a trip to Universal Studios, you think you would prefer to go to Hogwarts than live in real life. Everyone gets assigned a very useful pet owl, you can fly around on broomsticks and you don’t have to stick to MLA formatting or learn differential geometry. Sounds great! Except everyone is dying all the time. Cedric Diggory. Dead. Fred Weasley. Dead. Let’s face it, if there was an evil wizard trying to put an end to humanity on the campus of Ohio State, people would stop going there.
Just to recap – Hogwarts:
Pros: magic and other cool stuff
Cons: death is everywhere.
By this logic, our goal this episode is to figure out what would be the best fictional school to attend. We found that most schools in fiction have a much higher death rate than the normal high school or university. We’ll take that into consideration.
Co-hosts Jack O’Brien and Daniel O’Brien are joined by Cracked’s Josh Sargent and Alex Schmidt, and comedians Alison Leiby, Brandie Posey, Riley Silverman and Steven Wilbur to talk Hogwarts, Starfleet Academy, Sunnydale High and more.
Alison Leiby’s Website: https://goo.gl/Dk4XHS
Alison Leiby’s Standup: https://goo.gl/nFm8P3
Brandie Posey’s Website: http://goo.gl/evH4MH
Brandie Posey’s Standup: https://goo.gl/7gVzdI
Riley Silverman’s Website: http://goo.gl/CNZZYj
Riley Silverman’s Standup: https://goo.gl/ADU1qG
Steven Wilber’s Website: http://goo.gl/OH9jB9
Steven Wilber’s Standup: https://goo.gl/8vJBl1
Cracked: The 5 Most Depraved Sex Scenes Implied By Harry Potter: http://goo.gl/RVSM5
Cracked: 6 Horrifying Implications of the Harry Potter Universe: http://goo.gl/uiaMd
Cracked: Why Hogwarts Was All in Harry’s Head: http://goo.gl/xLALu
Cracked: My Brief Time as a Student at Hogwarts: http://goo.gl/M05Mm
Cracked: After Hours: 5 Movie High Schools That Would Suck To Attend: https://goo.gl/yNRe8H
This episode is sponsored by Wealthfront Veritone, Magoosh, and the Now Hear This Podcast Festival.
January 26, 2020
Freedom sucks…and that is why we have to defend it. Because our democracy involves doing a lot of stuff that takes energy, takes time, and lacks that Michael Bay Quality that only a surprise missile launch can provide. So on this episode of The Cracked Podcast, Alex Schmidt and special guest Jason Pargin (who writes for Cracked as David Wong) are exploring the ways being afraid of everything (an easy action) can stop us from being free. Discover the decades-long tradition of some Americans wanting to give up everything in exchange for not needing to think, the centuries-long tradition of people inciting fake panics, and the reasonable ways you can help change things for the better.
January 19, 2020
How’s your local shopping mall doing? Have you checked on it lately? Swing by sometime, because its department store might’ve turned into a call center or a hospital or a go-kart track. On this episode of The Cracked Podcast, Alex Schmidt is joined by the one and only Kai Ryssdal (Marketplace, Make Me Smart) for a look at surprising, strange, and shocking stories from all over the U.S. economy. Discover an international pig flu, a 26-word statement that built the modern Internet, and more amazing ways cash is ruling everything around you. By the way, if you’re an American listener, you spent the past few years funding an astonishingly huge bailout. Surprise! Listen for details!
January 12, 2020
Movies, TV, gaming: three things that are theoretically a waste of time. Oh sure, they deliver value in the art sense, and comfort in the goofing-off sense. But what if they’re more valuable than that? What if consuming shows and playing video games (accidentally) turns people into real-life heroes? On this episode of The Cracked Podcast, Alex Schmidt is joined by comedians/writers Caitlin Gill and Alex Watt for a look at the surprising number of times that exact thing happened. They’ll explore stories of regular people who saved a life thanks to skills gained randomly from cartoons, sitcoms, ‘World Of Warcraft’, and more silly entertainment.