EP. S2E53 — C*mming In Your Cast Iron w/ Punkie Johnson

Ashley Ray [00:00:28] Welcome to TV, I Say with Ashley Ray. Your go-to podcast for discovering what to watch on TV and getting behind the scenes insight from the people who make the shows you love… Usually, right? Usually every week we come together, we talk to someone–an actor maybe, maybe writers–and we have them talk about the shows they love, the shows they’re working on, the shows they have coming out. And guess what, everyone? This is our first episode we’ve recorded post-SAG strike. So, you know, our last episode, we got to talk about the Emmys, talk about so many wonderful things because we recorded it the day before SAG decided to strike. And now we’re on the other side. We are, I think, two weeks into it by the time you’ll be hearing this for the SAG strike. And then we still have WGA on strike. So, it is a hot dual strike summer. And I am sure a lot of you are wondering, “Ashley, you have a podcast about television. What are you going to do if your guests can’t talk about television?” You see, there are a lot of rules when it comes to the SAG strike. The WGA strike, of course, had a lot of rules too. With SAG, it is a little more blurry. So, actors are not allowed to promote projects they have worked on in the past or in the present. So as much as we typically get a lot of guests who come on and want to talk about their current things–and we love to talk about the shows that inspire them–they aren’t allowed to do that. There is a little bit of a gray area around whether or not our actors can talk about TV shows they enjoy from the past that are no longer airing. But basically, SAG does not want anyone to promote or discuss shows on social media, on their podcast–anything that could basically be seen as promotion. And that is not just for actors but also for fans, influencers, and anyone who thinks, you know, “Maybe someday I might end up in SAG.” So that also goes for people like me–where I fall in that category of, you know, I act, I do stand up, and I also cannot promote a lot of the shows that I, you know, have worked on–things that I’ve done. So, to that extent, it does get a little confusing. And I think this is why we saw so many influencers online who were asking so many questions. I do want to give a shoutout to Franchesca Ramsey, who has been giving us so much information and guidance on this on TikTok and Twitter and has been just the best at helping me understand what I can talk about, what I can’t talk about. And, you know, obviously all of us here support SAG. So, we want to follow these rules, but it is a little tricky. So, there were people who, you know, said, “Hey, I am not really an influencer, but I am a TV critic. And I also, say, have my own newsletter where I talk about shows that I want people to watch. What falls in line there?” And if you’re a journalist doing criticism, of course you’re still allowed to do your job because criticism and TV media–those types of pieces that really get into the discourse–aren’t promotional, right? Otherwise, there wouldn’t be TV or movie reviews. So, you know, there isn’t an inherent promotional aspect to that. So, you as a journalist can write that. But say you’re an influencer on TikTok and you’re a big fan of a new show that just had a new season premiere and you like to do recaps, or you like to just tell people to watch every week, as I do with many things–that would be promotional. And so that’s where you aren’t really doing the job of a journalist because you’re a fan, obviously. So that’s a good way to kind of figure it out for yourself if you’re like, “Hey, can I post this? Is this okay?” You know, is it something that a fan would say, or is it coming from a critical journalistic standpoint? So obviously, not every show that I talk about on this podcast is focused on getting you to watch it. We do obviously criticize a lot of shows here. But, you know, at the end of the day, this is a podcast that celebrates all television. So even when we talk about a show and maybe an issue or something we have with it, at the end of the day, the point of this show is to get you to love and appreciate television and all of its forms and the difficulties it takes to make that television from behind the scenes, from directors, from writers to actors. So, could I find some gray area loopholes to get your favorite actors on here and to get them to talk around the shows they were in–to talk about shows they like? Yeah. If you want to find a loophole in this strike, you can find a loophole. But that’s not what we’re doing here, okay? Because we support SAG, we support WGA, and we know we’re going to win, okay? We’re going to win this thing. I mean, come on. We got the actors on our side now. There’s no way they’re going to let hot, attractive actors, like, strike in the sun for as long as they’re letting us writers do it. That’s just impossible. It’s not happening. So, we’re going to just keep supporting SAG. We will be having a shift, you know, in the type of guest you see us having and the conversations we have. We will still be celebrating television that we can talk about. On the other side of things, SAG did put out a wonderful guideline of things you can still do and can still talk about. So, TV shows that are international or not covered by the AMPTP–those can still be talked about. Reality television–we can still talk about it, baby. And you know I love to talk about reality TV with all my favorite actors and comedians. So really, we don’t need to worry. We don’t need to be worried on this side of things because we have plenty of TV we can still celebrate–plenty of things we can still talk about. We can still talk about podcasts–other projects they’re working on. We are also still able to talk about shows that are covered by the Animation Guild. So, you know… You can figure this out. I know there are a lot of influencers–a lot of people online–who feel like the SAG guidelines are a little too strict and make it difficult for people who want to just enjoy and support TV to do that. But hey, you know what? That’s the point of a strike. It is to be disruptive. That’s the whole point, right? It has to disrupt things. It has to be noticeable. And we want Hollywood to notice that without the fans who support these actors, without the influencers who are moved by these pieces or who are driven to write detailed breakdowns of acting scenes just in their free time–half the time not even getting paid to make TikToks about it–removing that from the system shows Hollywood the sort of impact that SAG has. So, I am happy to help to do my part, and I hope you are too. So, you know, this episode we have Punkie Johnson joining us and… Well, hey, you know Punkie from a lot of shows that we can’t mention. I don’t even need to. You know how the internet works. You know these people. But today we have Punkie, and Punkie is going to talk about her new podcast. You see how we do when we can’t–? We pivot. Okay? Now you get the benefit of getting to see Punkie Johnson on tour this summer, working on her new hour. And she has an amazing, hilarious podcast coming out that we’re going to talk about. So, you know, yeah. You’re not going to feel like anything has changed around here. We’re still going to be laughing, we’re going to be having a good time, and we’re going to be talking about all the shows you love. Maybe just more of them are going to be shows you watch on TLC or Bravo, which honestly, is that any different? Probably not. I will give you a brief watchlist this week. You know, like I said, on our watchlist, going forward through the strike, I am going to be highlighting shows that are not struck productions–going to be focusing a lot on reality TV, international shows, and documentaries that I think are really, really amazing. So, number one on that list? Ooh, guys. This is the hit of the summer for me. My Strange Addiction: Still Addicted. It debuted last Wednesday. My Strange Addiction–yes, it is back ten years later. And they have new addictions. They are checking in on old addictions. It is the best thing in the world. So, our debut episode focuses on a woman who eats toilet paper. And she doesn’t just, like, eat toilet paper. She marinades the toilet paper according to her. She takes the toilet paper in strips. And she, like, puts it between dryer sheets. And then she’ll put some laundry detergent for flavoring. And she lets it sit like that for a few days. And then she eats the toilet paper so that it tastes like detergent. And she goes to the doctor because that’s a big part of the show. They’re like, “Okay, you have this obsession. Let’s see if it’s healthy for you.” And the doctor is like, “Girl. No.” She’s just like, “No, you got to stop doing this.” And the girl is just like, “So you’re saying that, like, I can’t have children–that I might die–if I don’t stop eating toilet paper?” And the doctor just like, “Yeah.” And she’s like, “Well, I’m not going to stop.” So, she doesn’t come through to the other side of her addiction, sadly. But we do check in with an old addiction, and that is a guy who you may remember as being married to his car–his car Chase–which is a good name for a car. Frankly, if you’re going to fall in love with the car, why not name it Chase? But it is about a man who falls in love with his car. And we find out in this ten-year update that that car was involved in an accident and was totaled, and he no longer has it. But do not worry because he did make a bed out of some of the car parts, and then he created a, like, blanket that is a photo collage of him and Chase, the car. And he’s like, “These are just some cute pictures of us together.” And it’s, like, literally pictures of him just sitting in front of this car. And then he’s like, “These are pictures of him taking a bath.” And it’s the car being washed, and it’s just, like, on this blanket. I cannot wait for more episodes of this show. I know they’re bringing back the couple who drinks their own pee. Oh, this was in the episode. There was a woman who was obsessed with eating cat hair, who we met ten years ago. And don’t worry–in the ten years since, she’s just eating more cat hair. She just is eating more of it. If you look at your own life and you feel a little stagnant and like things haven’t changed for you, just keep in mind you’re probably doing better than the woman who’s like, “Oh, I’m having a wonderful decade. I went from eating the hair of one cat to seven.” After that on the list, guess what is back, baby? Below Deck: Down Under! Yes. Our hottest Below Deck captain is back. Thank goodness. Oh, thank goodness. Look, this was the best season of Below Deck: Sailing Yacht. And yes, we will talk about that reunion. We will talk about it. But Below Deck: Down Under is back. And from the very first episode of this season, we’re pretty much getting right into the drama. We have, like, the worst guests on the boat. We all know the number one rule of Below Deck: Sailing Yacht or any Below Deck. We all know the main rule. You don’t swim at night. You cannot get in the water at night without the crew there; it’s a whole thing. And of course, the first guests that they get on Below Deck: Down Under are just like, “We are jumping in the water. We don’t care. We’re drunk. We want to fight.” And it is just instant drama because obviously this, like, hot Australian captain–he does not play that. He is just like, “We’ll end the trip right now, mate. I’ll go right back into the… to the… binny.” I’m just making that up as a thing Australians call a “dock.” He’s like, “I’ll end it right now.” And it’s amazing. I felt like it took Sailing Yacht so much time to get going. By the time we were like, “What is up with Gary and Colin and Daisy?” it was the end of the season. And I feel like with Down Under we’re getting right into the drama. After that, we have Last Call. Last Call–it’s a documentary series that’s been airing on HBO. We’re two episodes in. It’s a four-part series, and it is about a serial killer who stalked New York, killing homosexual men. It’s basically set, I believe, in the early ’90s. One of the murders is in ’93. And he does these murders over the course of several years. And it basically shows you how the cops were so incompetent and just homophobic and did nothing to really help these people or to solve the crime because they truly just did not believe these victims mattered. I think the saddest part is how even these families still suffer from the homophobia. You see some cousins of the people who are deceased being like, “Well, no, he was never gay. He wasn’t gay.” Even though there’s so much evidence that he was. But still, as a family, they cannot be open and accept the truth of their relative and how they lived. So, it’s an incredibly well-done documentary. It is based on a book that also went into the serial killer in the subject. So that gives them just some really, really great firsthand accounts from family relatives from this, you know, book that put together all these resources. It is probably my favorite documentary of the summer so far. I’ve just been blown away by the emotional depth. And I think when we look at true crime today, which I think is justifiably getting a lot of slack… I think obviously the true crime genre has a lot of issues. How we navigate true crime has issues. So often it is used to be propaganda to celebrate the police. This isn’t doing that. So often true crime is used to celebrate serial killers or these horrible people. And Last Call is also not focused on doing that. It is truly focused on the victims and their stories. And I think that is true crime at its best–when it is giving a voice to victims who are voiceless and were voiceless in their death. And so, hey, I think it’s a great documentary. I know you probably don’t want to watch any more true crime stuff. There’s so much crime. But I would say this is very different. And it’s probably, I think, the standard of what true crime should be moving forward. So, hey, there you go. After that, we have Dark Side of the 2000s because Vice is just basically trying to make me feel old. We had Dark Side of the 90s. Fair enough. Fair enough. Now we have Dark Side of the 2000s. Okay, buddy. I don’t know. I don’t know about this. I was ten. What are we talking about? Like, you guys don’t remember this stuff? It just happened, actually. But actually, the first episode was pretty enlightening. I did enjoy it. So Dark Side of the 2000s–it does sound like I Love the ’80s, I Love the ’90s–but each episode focuses on one topic versus sort of the overall year of a decade. So, the first episode was about Jon & Kate Plus 8–Jon and Kate Gosselin–which is a show I never really watched. I never cared about that. I truly just have never understood the interest in families that have a lot of kids. I just never saw why that was interesting to people as a TV subject. Maybe it’s because I grew up in a house with a lot of kids–but never pulled me in. So, I wasn’t aware of the level of drama involved with Jon & Kate Plus 8, Kate Gosselin and her children, the father getting custody, and Kate Gosselin being abusive and basically sending one of her sons to, like, a mental institution. So–hey–definitely dark. Definitely got into some dark sides in that episode. And I am excited for the rest of it, even though I am not old. I’m so young. I’m so young. Oh no. Can we do Dark Side of the ’80s? Like, do that one first. Like, what even happened in the ’80s? I don’t know. I wasn’t alive because I’m so young. Anyway. And we also have Dark Side of the Ring, which is still going. I have been enjoying these past few episodes. Obviously, I loved the episode on Abdullah the Butcher. As a Bruiser Brody fan, obviously I’m a big fan of Abdullah. I will say I wasn’t aware of the darker aspects of his later career and how he, you know, had to basically retire because from cutting himself and others for so long, he had, like, given himself this very rare strain of hepatitis C that he passed to another wrestler. And that ruined that wrestler’s chances of getting into WWE. I had no idea about any of that drama. So really good episode of Dark Side of the Ring. I think the best ones are when you actually learn something new because a lot of them are just kind of like, “Yeah, I knew the Junkyard Dog got addicted to drugs. Yeah. That’s how that story goes.” So that’s your watchlist. And we will be right back with Punkie Johnson. So today we have Punkie Johnson here, who is a SAG member, because you know her from a lot of things you’ve probably watched that you love–that, again, we will not be mentioning.

Punkie Johnson [00:18:10] Can’t say it.

Ashley Ray [00:18:11] And we don’t need to say it. Like, your name is in the streets. They know. They know. All I need to say is, Punkie, you know what’s up. Okay. But today we are talking about something I’m so excited about. And that’s your new podcast, Love Thang. Welcome to TV Club. Thank you for joining me. I am so excited about this podcast. It is with. Kevin Hart’s production company and Sirius, I believe. And it is you and a friend giving people the relationship advice they need.

Punkie Johnson [00:18:38] I don’t know if they need it.

Ashley Ray [00:18:42] They need it. It’s a mess out here in the streets right now. Like, how did you come up with this idea? Were you seeing that everyone is struggling?

Punkie Johnson [00:18:50] No, I was struggling. It’s a way for me to flesh out what I got going on. You know, at the end of the day, first of all–number one–I talk too much. Let’s just put it to you like that. That’s what a podcast is. It’s all about talking, communicating, being verbal. That’s what it’s about. I talk too much; I talk too fast. So, my team was like, “Yeah, you’re going to need a podcast because you obviously got a lot to say.” That was just a basis of what it’s going to be about. And most of my comedy is about my love life. So, I’m like, “Let’s make it all about love lives.” So, we did that. And the reason why it’s that is because I was in a relationship for 20 years–a marriage for seven years–and I feel like it failed so miserably that I have all the tools you need to do the opposite of what I did.

Ashley Ray [00:19:36] Yeah. I want to ask you about some… I thought we could go through some of the dating advice that has been going viral recently. There’s been a lot of drama, and I want your take on it because I think that kids need help out here. So, I don’t know if you saw, last week, someone–a guy presumably–asked a girl out. They start texting, and he says, “Well, it’s really hot out. Maybe we can grab some ice cream.” And she says, “Oh, that’s the bare minimum? Ice cream on a first date? You don’t deserve me, baby. No, we don’t need to talk anymore.” The person just is like, “Okay, that’s fine. We’re done here.”

Punkie Johnson [00:20:15] Listen, we in a time when nobody thinks of anything nice and just cute and simple no more. Everybody just wants to go big and outdo the other person. Like, an ice cream day sounds fun.

Ashley Ray [00:20:29] Right?

Punkie Johnson [00:20:29] First of all, who asks you to go on an ice cream date? This got to be a different type of dude. I ain’t never been on no ice cream date.

Ashley Ray [00:20:37] I’ve been on some, but they’ve never just been– Like, I always know it’s like, “Oh, we’re going to get ice cream. We’ll walk around, maybe go to a farmer’s market, you know?” But I’m never just like, “Oh, you must be broke.” And when I said I was okay with an ice cream date, Twitter came for me. They said I’m a low value woman. My “standards are on the floor. I accept the bare minimum.

Punkie Johnson [00:20:59] Yeah, why does that have to all align with financials.

Ashley Ray [00:21:04] Right? And ice cream can be expensive.

Punkie Johnson [00:21:08] But also, he ain’t just say that. He was like, “This is where we going to start.”

Ashley Ray [00:21:13] Yeah. “That’s where we start. It’s hot. Let’s grab an ice cream and then do stuff.” And so, Twitter has been–for, like, at least five days–debating over this is. What should a first date be? Personally, I think a first date should be bare minimum. I think, you know, there’s no reason for me to put two hours into getting ready for someone I don’t know. You know, let’s just get a coffee–see if we actually like each other.

Punkie Johnson [00:21:34] I agree.

Ashley Ray [00:21:35] You agree. Thank you.

Punkie Johnson [00:21:36] Well, I think ice cream is the equivalent to a cup of coffee. But instead of getting some hot in this heat, let’s go get something cooling this heat. You know what? Did it say how old the girl was?

Ashley Ray [00:21:50] I believe they were 24 and 26–somewhere around that age.

Punkie Johnson [00:21:57] You know what? I can’t even say it because I think a 38-year-old woman would just as much have said that depending on value and standards or whatever. I hate today’s day and age where it’s like, “Why does everything have to start so grand?”

Ashley Ray [00:22:14] Right?

Punkie Johnson [00:22:15] What are we going to do besides ice cream? What? I’m going to take you on a goddamn helicopter for a first date? That’s what I want to do for a second.

Ashley Ray [00:22:22] Yeah. And then people were like, “Oh, well, look at this.” People are, like, giving examples of, like, extravagant first days. And someone was like, “Oh, look at this thread. This guy said that he, like, flew this girl out to Columbia for their first date. He had never even met her before. He bought her a plane ticket. And then it came out that he murdered her, like, seven months later.”

Punkie Johnson [00:22:38] Before you said that, I was thinking, “Yeah, that’s called stupid first dates.”

Ashley Ray [00:22:42] See? That’s what happens. These men who spent a ton of money on you, and then they’re like, “Oh, I bought you. I get to have sex with you. I get to do this.” And that’s how you end up. They kill you. They’re crazy. If a man is taking you to Nobu and helicopter rides on the first date, that’s a red flag, honestly, for me.

Punkie Johnson [00:22:58] And honestly, she should have went on the ice cream date. She could have shown him what that tongue do.

Ashley Ray [00:23:03] Get a little sexy with it.

Punkie Johnson [00:23:05] “I’m gonna lick this cone and show you what the tongue do.”

Ashley Ray [00:23:09] See? And so, I do want to ask though… My dating life is a mess, too. I could use your guidance–your brilliance–here. And this ice cream catastrophe–it brought up some. triggering memories for me. I dated a guy who, like… I got sick one time. I had a sore throat. He was like, “Is there anything I can bring you? Anything you need, girl?” And I was like, “Oh my gosh, you must really care about me. Like, men don’t do that. Newt Gingrich–his wife got cancer, and he was like, “Bye, bitch. I’m out. That’s not my problem.” So, I had a little sore throat, and this man is like, “Can I get you something?” And I played it sexy. I was like, “All I want is some vanilla ice cream,” because I was thinking, like, “Let me show you what my tongue do with it. Just vanilla ice cream–sexy.” You know, I wanted to be like, “I want five bags of Cheetos and some Dr. Pepper,” but I played it sexy. And what he said to me–and this was a grown, 40-year-old man with a job–was, “I don’t have ice cream money.”

Punkie Johnson [00:24:10] Well, in that case, my thought is going immediately to “Well, how the hell are you going to get me some Theraflu?”

Ashley Ray [00:24:15] Right? Why did you ask?

Punkie Johnson [00:24:19] Because when I’m sick, I need Theraflu, I need Sprite, I need oranges, I Vicks. That’s gonna cost you about a good $37. So, if you don’t got $3.75, that’s going to be a problem.

Ashley Ray [00:24:31] I’m not asking for Jeni’s. I’m not asking for expensive ice cream. I’m asking if you could just get the CVS store brand vanilla. I don’t care. But he said, “I don’t have ice cream money,” and I was immediately like, “We need to end this relationship. You don’t care about me. We are done here.” And my friends are like, “That’s harsh. No. Maybe he was having money issues.” No. Okay, I’ve had ice cream money since I was 12 years old. It’s not expensive.

Punkie Johnson [00:24:57] I could go to my couch right now and find money for ice cream.

Ashley Ray [00:25:01] I’m not worth moving the couch cushion for an ice cream cone, sir?

Punkie Johnson [00:25:05] I promise you, I got about $3.75 in the sofa.

Ashley Ray [00:25:08] Punkie, what would you have done? Would you end things?

Punkie Johnson [00:25:13] I think I would have ended it just based off the simple fact that “You a grown man, you in your 40s.” What are we doing at this point? You know, when I was married, my wife did something very particular to me one day, and it made me so mad. I was at a party on this side of town. She was at a party on that side of town. And she hit me up, and she was like, “Can you bring me home?” I say, “Why?” She said, “Because I don’t have money for Uber.” So, in my mind, “You went somewhere knowing you ain’t have the money to get back. And what grown woman does that?”

Ashley Ray [00:25:43] Okay, I’ve done that.

Punkie Johnson [00:25:45] What? How old are you?

Ashley Ray [00:25:48] I mean, I’m 32. And I did that literally last week. I went to a party, and I was like, “You know what? I’ll meet somebody who will give me a ride home. I can, like, find somebody to hop in a car with.”

Punkie Johnson [00:25:58] But if you wanted to, you could have Ubered.

Ashley Ray [00:26:02] Yes. It was like one of those, like… If I need to, I can dip into the savings and get an Uber. It was one of those.

Punkie Johnson [00:26:12] She had none of that.  I just think sometimes when a relationship is… I hate the fact that finances can play a big part in it, but unfortunately it does because the person that has the most money is probably doing the most. And that could get stressful because that means that that person can’t fail. Because if this person fails, they have no room to make mistakes. You know what I’m saying? If that person makes a mistake, then it’s over for everybody. So, I think it’s very… I see why famous people date famous people. I see why people who have money date people who have money. I understand it because it can get a little hectic when you are not rich and maybe you making, like, 100,000, which once you cut the taxes is really like 60,000. You might as well work at a grocery store. You know, once they cut the taxes at the grocery store, you still probably at 55.

Ashley Ray [00:27:02] Yeah. And at least that way you qualify for, like, Medi-Cal and stuff. I mean, you get in a good tax bracket versus the 100k where now you’re kind of screwed over.

Punkie Johnson [00:27:10] And you don’t qualify for first time homebuyers.

Ashley Ray [00:27:12] Don’t get first time homebuyers. Like, it’s kind of a mess, actually, if you hit 100k because it’s not enough.

Punkie Johnson [00:27:18] It’s really weird to just be in that type of predicament with somebody who makes half what you making. It’s just a complicated financial situation. I’m sorry to take it this far with some ice cream.

Ashley Ray [00:27:31] But yeah, that’s just the start. If you don’t have ice cream money for me, down the road, who knows where that goes? That’s like, “I don’t have toilet paper money for you. I keep my own in my room.” Like, that’s not a basis for a good relationship.

Punkie Johnson [00:27:45] Yeah. And if you can’t take care of me when I’m down, you can’t take care of me when I’m up.

Ashley Ray [00:27:50] So thank you for saying I was right to leave that broke boy.

Punkie Johnson [00:27:54] Did you break up with him, like, the day of or a couple of days after?

Ashley Ray [00:27:58] A couple days after. I, like, gave him some time. And I was just, via text, like, “I just don’t think this is really going to work. Blah, blah, blah.” And then we had gone to the movies, I think, the weekend before and bought separate tickets because he was truly like, “I don’t have enough to buy your ticket.” But then he did have enough to get a popcorn that he was like, “Let’s split.” And the day I ended it, he sent me a Venmo request for half the cost of a medium popcorn from the movies.

Punkie Johnson [00:28:25] Who are these guys that’s doing it? Like, is this out of petty or bitterness? I want to know because, listen, I’m gay, but I have such an old school traditional mentality of the way I operate in relationships. You know, a lot of people don’t do this no more, but I’m strictly gender roles. I take care of things. I’m the more dominant one. I take out the trash, mow the lawn, pay the bills, I make sure things… Chivalry is all up over here.

Ashley Ray [00:28:54] Yeah.

Punkie Johnson [00:28:55] So I’m not going to be asking my lady for no money. And if I ain’t got it, I’m going to go hustle and get it.

Ashley Ray [00:29:03] It’s not about to be, “Oh, well, I didn’t have the full $7 to cover that popcorn. So let me get this back.” And I like that you brought up that it can be difficult to date someone who is in a different financial bracket, who’s doing differently, because I think that’s another big just celebrity dating issue we’ve seen come up with Halle Bailey and DDG, her failed… And this is not my words but what they call him on the Shade Room. Her failed rapper boyfriend who is Twitch famous put out a new song that was like, “You know, girl, I get insecure seeing you on set with another man.” And basically, just described what acting is. He was like, “I get mad seeing you hold hands with him on the set of The Little Mermaid.” And it’s like, “Are you aware of the story and that she’s playing a character?”

Punkie Johnson [00:29:55] So, okay, I’m split with that, too, because what he did is kind of a form of being a true artist–just describing how you feel, using your emotions, being vulnerable I’m pretty sure he must feel like that because even in acting, it could get a little like, “That kiss meant something.”

Ashley Ray [00:30:13] Yeah. And they were holding hands on the red carpet. And people were making whole TikToks being like, “She needs to leave DDG for this guy.”

Punkie Johnson [00:30:22] They are cute together.

Ashley Ray [00:30:23] Yeah, they are really cute.

Punkie Johnson [00:30:24] I’m not gonna lie. But also on the other side, I think it’s getting really ridiculous with the lack of privacy people have in their relationships. You know, like, the current woman I’m seeing right now–she’s always saying, like, these little sly remarks of: “I ain’t never gonna post somebody if they don’t post me.” And I’m like, “Are you talking to me? Are you speaking directly to me?”

Ashley Ray [00:30:50] It seems like that’s the message.

Punkie Johnson [00:30:52] “You talking out loud. I feel like you’re trying to tell me something. I don’t need you posting me on nothing because I don’t care. Don’t post me, number one.”

Ashley Ray [00:31:02] Yeah, don’t post me. I don’t need that. Like, if you post me, you know what’s going to happen? You’re going to get haters. You’re going to get people bothering you because they don’t like some joke I told five years ago, okay? It’s just going to be a mess.

Punkie Johnson [00:31:13] So she tried to give me a message. I’m like, “Girl, you was in my story a couple times. You don’t need to be on the main page.”

Ashley Ray [00:31:20] Do they want the main and the tag? Is it like, “Not just the main part, but you gotta tag me–I want the Woman Crush Wednesday”?

Punkie Johnson [00:31:28] You know, it’s just all about the thing of who’s ever into the social media. I’m not really into the subliminals. I don’t care. She’s very involved in social media. She’s, you know, “I got my thong on. I’m hot. These niggas is thirsty,” and all this stuff. And I’m not like that. I don’t even post my job stuff. People gotta force me to post it. They’re like, “Punkie, in contract, you have to post this.” I’m like, “Yeah.”

Ashley Ray [00:31:55] They’re like, “Ashley, please. You’ve got to promote this podcast. Could you please make a post?” And I’ll do, like, what they do now–the kids like to call them “photo dumps.” Or I’m just like, “Here’s a bunch of people I’ve been hanging out with, and you connect the dots.”

Punkie Johnson [00:32:09] I’m getting better at posting. I started posting for real for real, like, Thursday.

Ashley Ray [00:32:15] Yeah. And I mean, in your longer relationship was that an issue? As you were getting bigger–I mean, your 20-year relationship and marriage–was it like, “Well, I already know you from before all the fame hit”? Or was it like, “Well, why are you, like, famous now and you not posting me?”

Punkie Johnson [00:32:31] I started doing something with my life after the divorce. So that goes to show you people, let go of that toxic stuff. Things start happening and turning out real good for you once you let go of that dead weight. Let go of that dead weight. Forget them kids. Forget them dogs. Forget them in-laws. Listen, if it ain’t sitting right in your soul when you go to sleep at night, you losing rest? Absolutely not. Go. Get out. Forget that childhood. Forget that first love. I don’t care. It got to the point I couldn’t sleep at night. I’m crying to myself to sleep because I know I’m not supposed to be here, but I stayed anyway. No, get out of it. Don’t do it, people. Don’t do it. But her and I–we were high school sweethearts.

Ashley Ray [00:33:25] Aw.

Punkie Johnson [00:33:25] Because I was just messing around doing comedy. I was serious about it, but I didn’t think it would go past that stage. So, we would post stuff together. I would do a lot of jokes… Like, I had a viral video because I was talking about a lot of gay stuff and what it was like being with a woman in a relationship. So, I showed her a lot. But as far as anything past that… I was trying to make a reality series with me and her, and I’m just happy we didn’t do that.

Ashley Ray [00:33:55] Oh, yeah. So, what made you want to do this podcast? Is it to help all these kids to make them realize? I love that you got divorced later. I also had a high school sweetheart that I almost married when I was, like… He proposed when I was 19. We almost got married at, like, 22. And it was the same thing. I was just like, “Something isn’t right about this. I’m a different person. I’ve changed. I’ve grown.” And, like, stepping out into that new world of being single after, like, being with one person for so long–I was just like, “What is happening out here? What is going on?”

Punkie Johnson [00:34:47] And then you get buck wild because when we separated–before I got into this other relationship–I was single for, like, two years, just out here, popping it everywhere. I was in every state, just acting a plum fool.

Ashley Ray [00:35:00] Were you on the dating apps? Were you on the apps?

Punkie Johnson [00:35:02] No, no, no. No dating apps. I was just meeting people. And I was always scared to do dating apps because I’m like, “That could always come back on you. Screenshot. Never know what’s going on with dating apps.” I’m afraid of dating apps, so I don’t do them.

Ashley Ray [00:35:16] Yeah. I mean, I get people who messaged me, and they’re like, “Oh my God, I recognize you from this. I’m such a fan of it.” And I’m just like, “This is too creepy.” One person messaged me–they’re like, “I listen to every single episode of your podcast. I feel like I know you. I’m ready to go out.” And I was like, “You should never say this to someone.”

Punkie Johnson [00:35:32] No.

Punkie Johnson [00:35:35] Keep the subscription in the downloads, but don’t put your ears to the headphones.

Ashley Ray [00:35:38] Right? You don’t need to say to me– And now you’re probably listening and hearing this. That’s why I didn’t reply to your message. But I was just like, “That’s too much.” Where’s the fun in getting to know each other if you’re like, “I already have listened to every single thing. I’ve seen every single thing about you.” And also, I feel like what you present as a comic on social media channels to sell tickets and to have a brand is very different from who you are as a person. You know, I get on stage, I tell jokes about how dating is awful and all the awful people I’ve dated–but I’m in a steady, wonderful relationship right now.

Punkie Johnson [00:36:16] So, ice cream is gone?

Ashley Ray [00:36:19] Oh, ice cream is gone. Ice cream is gone. Although the person I’m in a relationship with now–our first day was ice cream. So, Twitter told me he’s a bum. I’m a low value woman. I shouldn’t have accepted this. Also, on that first date, I did pay for my own ice cream. I did. But that was on me because when I walked up to the ice cream place, he was sitting outside playing an electric bass, like, with no amp–just playing it outside–and I just thought that was so weird. I was like, “I’m not going to like this guy. I’m going to buy my own ice cream. I don’t want any attachments here.” I went in after him. I didn’t even talk to him. I just went in myself, got my ice cream, went back out, sat with him, and was like, “Oh, don’t worry. This will be quick probably.”

Punkie Johnson [00:37:07] And you know what? I want to let everybody know what you said is so true because everything you think is going to be, like, weird and “no” turns out to be something so cool.

Ashley Ray [00:37:16] So cool and wonderful. Now it’s been, like, seven months, and, you know, he does my dishes and cooks me lunch and dinner every day. And I’m like, “Okay, maybe it was worth buying my own ice cream for that one date.”

Punkie Johnson [00:37:29] Well, you should go and talk to Twitter about that.

Ashley Ray [00:37:31] Oh, no. Oh, no. If I even mention that I paid for that ice cream myself, Twitter will come for me. They’ll be like, “See, I knew it. You broke bitch.”

Punkie Johnson [00:37:41] But that’s the thing. It’s all about what people determine as valuable. You know, if you one of those types of females or men that the value to you is money, then if y’all doing something and it has no value on a dollar, then of course it’s just going to be low value standard. But if you have other things that you value…If you in a house and you cooking and you keep the house clean–I ain’t saying, like, squeaky clean because we all have our trifling moments–you keep your house clean, you keep it together, I value that more.

Ashley Ray [00:38:18] I value that more. He comes over–he takes my trash out every single time. Like, I value that because I don’t have to do it.

Punkie Johnson [00:38:27] Yeah. I value a good, warm woman–a good, loyal woman. I value a family woman.

Ashley Ray [00:38:33] Yeah.

Punkie Johnson [00:38:34] You know, these things, they have no financial face value.

Ashley Ray [00:38:38] Yeah. You’re not going to figure that out at a ten-course meal first date, where you’re spending tons of money. The effort someone puts in you see over time.

Punkie Johnson [00:38:48] And your interest becomes of something else. Like, “Oh, you doing this? Okay, great. Well, even if they’re not on your level, let me increase, you know, my standards since you took me on a helicopter ride and this ten-course meal.” When you proud of yourself, it ain’t even worth all that shit.

Ashley Ray [00:39:04] Exactly.

Punkie Johnson [00:39:07] It’s just all this dating stuff is weird. I’m so happy to be off the streets. I can’t be outside.

Ashley Ray [00:39:13] It’s bad out here. I’m going to give one more dating story for my life that I could use your advice on. And then we’re going to talk about, you know, your podcast. We’re going to talk about how the strike has been impacting you. I tell my friends this story and they’re shocked by it. They are just like, “Ashley, no!” But I matched with someone. We were talking. We texted for, like, two weeks. You know, I like to really make sure someone’s not a creep. We meet up at a bar. We have a good time. He was an opera singer. There was, like, one red flag. He said that he lived in a studio apartment with his mom. But you know what? Times are tough. So, I was just like, “Okay… You know, good on you. You take care of your mom. I’m going to look at the positive there. But obviously, after this date, we’re going back to my place because we can’t go to your place.” And we go back to my place. We start kissing, you know, having a good time. And he stops and is like, “Hey, can I ask you a question? I want to see if you’re cool with one of my kinks.” And I’m like, “That’s a lot for a first date, but okay. Sure. This must be an important kink for you.” And he says that he wants to take one of my frying pans, heat it up on the stove, and come in it. And that’s his kink. He likes to come over a hot stove into a pan. And he’s, like, telling me all the logistics. He’s like, “It has to be cast iron first of all. If you have a step stool, that’s preferable. But I can stand on a chair. But, you know, the big part of it is feeling the heat on my balls and stuff. And that’s what I’m into. Would you be cool with that?” And I, of course, am just like, “No.” I was like, “Absolutely not. The one cast iron pan I have is from my grandmother, and that’s well-seasoned from just years of use. I’m not doing that.” And I’m making jokes. I’m just like, “Wait, how is this your kink if you live in a studio with your mother? How do you find that out about yourself? Like, are you just waiting for her to leave the house? Are you coming in your mom’s pans?” And he’s just like, “Yo, I don’t think we’re going to work.” Like, he rejected me because I wasn’t down with him wanting to come in my frying pan.

Punkie Johnson [00:41:32] Okay, okay, listen. Okay. All right. This is how I feel about that. Let me take my time and process all of this correctly.

Ashley Ray [00:41:39] Yeah, there’s a lot. There’s a lot.

Punkie Johnson [00:41:40] Right. So that’s a lot for the first date–number one. I do understand that people have one-night stands. I do understand that people get into these crazy deep talks on first dates. I get that. But seeing as that is one thing that is not the most normal thing–I think that could wait because I think that can scare anybody away.

Ashley Ray [00:42:09] Yeah!

Punkie Johnson [00:42:10] “Let’s get to know each other first. These are my pots.”

Ashley Ray [00:42:16] “I cook in them. Let me just cook a meal for you. Let’s get to know each other.” How many people are saying yes to this, though, on a first date that he was like, “You know what? I don’t need to continue on.”

Punkie Johnson [00:42:27] Obviously, nobody. He’s in a studio apartment with his mom. She’s probably the only one that said yes. That is the definition of unconditional love. She probably be like, “It’s time to come in your pot, Brian. Come on and come in your pot.”

Ashley Ray [00:42:43] I was just praying that it’s one of those studios where they have sheets hanging or dividers or something. But he’s like, “Oh, I stand on a wooden chair. Your mom is going to know.”

Punkie Johnson [00:42:57] You know, I think in certain instances, he will find a one for him that likes that. But also, it’s like… I’m gonna say this, right? So, I watch this show called [CENSORED]. I watch it all the time.

Ashley Ray [00:43:08] I love [CENSORED]. I’m obsessed with it.

Punkie Johnson [00:43:11] Oh, me too. I know the episodes in and out. And they have this one episode with this guy who loves to stick his penis in a beehive. And that’s one of his kinks.

Ashley Ray [00:43:22] That’s his kink. I remember this.

Punkie Johnson [00:43:24] He’s in the hospital. He gets his penis stung by a bee. The doctors are like, “Why do you do this? Why do you do this?” His wife comes in, and he’s unconscious. Of course, he’s healing. And the doctors are asking the wife, “Are you okay with being with him? Like, why does he do that? He sticks his penis in beehives.” And the wife is like, “Yes, but he does so many other great things. He takes care of me. He’s loyal to me. He’s a great husband. He’s grateful. It’s that one thing.”

Ashley Ray [00:44:01] Maybe that could have been my one person. He would have taken care of me–paid my rent and my bills. And his one thing is that he would have been coming in my cast iron frying pan.

Punkie Johnson [00:44:12] And that now goes into tolerance. How much can you tolerate?

Ashley Ray [00:44:17] Yeah.

Punkie Johnson [00:44:17] What is the scale of tolerance? You cut tolerance, and you coming into my pot. So, you just have all these other good qualities about you. Where does the scale fall?

Ashley Ray [00:44:28] Is that an automatic no for you?

Punkie Johnson [00:44:33] Well, you know what? I hope no one minds me saying this, but I boil my penises in pots. Now, if that’s the case, you can get him, like, his own special coming cast iron pot.

Ashley Ray [00:44:47] See? Yes. That’s kind of what I thought. If he came with his own pot, I wouldn’t have minded. If he had his own tools, I would have been like, “Fine.” It was the insistence on ruining my pots on the first date. But if he had been like, “Hold up a second. Let me pull out this, like, little travel cast iron,” I would have been like, “Okay, this is thoughtful.” So, I hope he hears this advice and he, like, fixes his game a little bit.

Punkie Johnson [00:45:15] You know what? I also think about how he feels–how he has this thing that probably no one thinks is normal. But he’s probably like, “You know what? Let me just get it out and get it over with. I don’t want you to think I’m frauding the next six months if I bust this out on you.”

Ashley Ray [00:45:29] “If we’re deep in it–I’ve met your friends and your family–and now all of a sudden, you have to come to terms with the fact that I like to come in a frying pot or pan.”

Punkie Johnson [00:45:37] So, yeah. I try to think about it on his level, too, because it’s not a normal thing for people. But it is normal to him.

Ashley Ray [00:45:43] And as far as it goes, it’s fairly harmless. It’s not like those weirdos who like to come in people’s food.

Punkie Johnson [00:45:51] A bagel.

Ashley Ray [00:45:52] Yeah, you’re cleaning the pot after.

Punkie Johnson [00:45:56] And, you know, I would tell you you missed out on a good one, but he lives with his mother in a studio apartment, so I can’t say that.

Ashley Ray [00:46:04] So again, I feel like I dodged another bullet there. But it’s so hard out on these streets.

Punkie Johnson [00:46:10] It is hard on these streets. Yeah, I’m not judging him for living with his mom. But think about the inconvenience that would have caused.

Ashley Ray [00:46:18] It’s so hard. Even the people who live with their mom and are coming in frying pans, like, feel like they can reject people. The fact that I didn’t get the chance to be like, “This isn’t going to work for me.” But he was like, “Listen up, girlie. We’re done here.” That’s why I was like, “Really?”

Punkie Johnson [00:46:34] He respects himself enough. He knows when he’s not appreciated.

Ashley Ray [00:46:39] He was done. So, I gotta respect that. People know their worth out here, even if sometimes maybe they need to take a step back and look. That is why I used to listen to Love Thang. It is on SiriusXM. You can listen to it on Laugh Out Loud Radio. It’s available to any SiriusXM subscribers nationwide in their cars, Channel 96. And it’s also on the SXM app. You’ve already changed my life with this advice. So, y’all, listen to this podcast. I know it’s going to be hilarious.

Punkie Johnson [00:47:11] We do some acting on a Love Thang podcast. We have different types of segments. We want to keep it light. We don’t want to get too deep. I mean, we do have segments where it’s vulnerable and it’s serious and it’s nice. But we also make sure we have other segments to balance it out, so we can keep it light and fun. You know what I’m saying? So, we just trying to mix it up, trying to do a little something different. So, give it a listen. Let us know if you like it.

Ashley Ray [00:47:33] Yes. And it’s wonderful you have this podcast right now. You know, as comedians who also act with the strike, which obviously we support so much, it has become difficult. You know, we can’t be in the shows we love. We can’t promote them. But it is wonderful when you can go on tour and you can do a podcast. How has that been for you? Are you, you know, prepping dates? Are you getting out there on the picket lines?

Punkie Johnson [00:47:59] The crazy thing is I haven’t been able to really be at the picket lines because I’m constantly on the go right now. I am out of New York City from Tuesday to Friday. I’m only here on a Monday. Then on Monday we do the podcast. But I’m on tour. Whoever listening, y’all hit my bios up on everything for you–Punkie Johnson on everything. Hit my bios. I’m in every city. We’re going to Indiana this weekend. We got to Detroit next weekend. Canada, California, Texas. We go, and we out here.

Ashley Ray [00:48:35] Are you gonna be in Montreal?

Punkie Johnson [00:48:37] No, no. We’re going to Toronto actually. So, the weekend everyone is going to be in Montreal, I’ll be in Detroit.

Ashley Ray [00:48:42] Okay. I love Detroit. That’s where my family is from. I know I got Detroit listeners. Go get your tickets.

Punkie Johnson [00:48:46] Yeah. Detroit, come through because I’m working on my special. It’s my first special. I ain’t gonna lie, I’m kind of frustrated because it’s something that I’m missing, and I just can’t find it. But the only thing I can do is keep coming out and keep allowing the people to help me. That’s how you find the funny–how you find the groove.

Ashley Ray [00:49:06] That’s how you find those bits. I mean, I had just recorded my first album last month. And I had jokes on there that I had written, like, five years ago that I was just like, “It’s just not ready. It’s not ready.” And you just keep performing it in front of people until you’re like, “Oh. Oh, I got it.” Or I was like, “I can’t find the bit to, like, connect this joke and this joke.” And then a year ago I happened to date a flat earther… Maybe the problem is I have horrible taste in who I choose to date.

Punkie Johnson [00:49:35] You need a podcast called My Dating Stories. You have dating stories forever. I mean, you’re not making this up. I can tell.

Ashley Ray [00:49:45] No, it’s very real. And yes, I dated a flat earther for a good six months, but he was very hot. And I think that’s what I need people to understand is that he was a very attractive person. But, you know, I got a lot of jokes from him. He also didn’t believe Canada was real. He didn’t believe that global warming was real. He didn’t believe in the California water crisis because he said the ocean is right there. And that’s kind of a good point. I was like, “Maybe we should get the government on the phone.”

Punkie Johnson [00:50:15] So you was dating a conspiracy theorist? He sounded conspiric. Some stuff he was like, “Oh, why?” Then some stuff he was like, “Nah.”

Ashley Ray [00:50:27] He straight up was just like, “Canada is a government PSYOP campaign. Everyone is a reptilian.”

Punkie Johnson [00:50:32] So he was conspirich.

Ashley Ray [00:50:34] Yeah. But it was, like, in a cuteish kind of way. But, like, finding that relationship helped me find the jokes to connect with the other dating things because it’s like the life experiences build. So, I love that you’re working on a special. I’m telling you, as a SAG person who also does stand-up, stand-up is what we have to rely on right now. Like, buy tickets to our shows. We are now here, like, you know, getting our acting paychecks. So that is one way you can help. Where else can people follow you?

Punkie Johnson [00:51:09] Follow me @punkiejohnson on all platforms. P.U.N.K.I.E., everybody. And tune into the Love Thang podcast. They got one segment that I love that everyone keeps hitting me up in my DMs about that I have to just keep bringing back. It’s called Thotrous Thoughts. It’s where women that sleep with multiple men hit me up and they give me all of their thotrous stories. I will never reveal to people who they are. But it’s all of my lady pimps who got multiple men, and they got the men wrapped around their finger.

Ashley Ray [00:51:42] Oh my gosh. Okay. I want to hear all about this.

Punkie Johnson [00:51:44] One of the last stories I got–this chick DM’d me. She was like, “I got a story for you.” I’m like, “Well, give it to me.” She said, “Yeah, girl. I let the maintenance man smash on my dining room table.” I say, “What? You hit the maintenance man?” She said, “Yeah, girl. He was looking good that day. And I just got it. It was like a movie. I just bent over and took it from the maintenance man.” She said, “It was so good, and it was so hot. And I just felt like being filthy that day. And he was just there.” They got men out that just be minding their business and get lucky.

Ashley Ray [00:52:28] I mean, I guess I have a friend who slept with her DoorDash delivery person one time.

Punkie Johnson [00:52:33] How hot is that?

Ashley Ray [00:52:34] Right? I mean, I’ve had times where I’m like, “Okay. I’m ordering a bunch of margaritas and some tacos. And if the person who delivered it was fine, I’d be like, “You want to stay?” But it’s never happened for me. I’ve never been that lucky. So, I’m like, “How are you scouting that out? Are you looking at the thing when they assign the driver?”

Punkie Johnson [00:52:51] I can’t lie. It sounds so hot. It’s stories like that that I sit up there, and I’ll be like, “Man, if I was a heterosexual, feminine woman, I would do stuff like that.”

Ashley Ray [00:53:08] I’d be kind of interested in, like, trying to tempt the maintenance man. I love this. I love those kinds of stories. Like, women should be thot celebrated. And if you have some stories, you need to hit Punkie up. DM with those stories.

Punkie Johnson [00:53:22] Please. Yo, if you’re single, you do whatever you want. Forget what everybody talking about. You pop it how you want to pop it.

Ashley Ray [00:53:27] Exactly.

Punkie Johnson [00:53:28] Go handle it. Go handle it.

Ashley Ray [00:53:30] Exactly. You know, women get a lot of shit for it. People want to tell us how, you know, “you got too many bodies, blah, blah, blah. Men won’t respect you.” Does not matter. These men are out here having sex with anything and everything, okay?

Punkie Johnson [00:53:44] And giving women BV.

Ashley Ray [00:53:48] Right. It’s terrifying. These men are coming in beehives and, like, frying pans and pots, and then they’re coming home to you. And so no, go do your business. Have a good time. I want to thank you so much for joining me. And also, listeners, you know, as I said, we are both in the Guild. We are both striking. So please donate to Hollywood crewmembers in need at the Entertainment Community Fund. If you want to support us, watch the shows still that we can’t talk about. But you know how to Google somebody’s name and look at IMDb and see what shows you might want to watch to support them. You know, we still want those viewing numbers, but please donate to help those of us who, you know, aren’t working–especially the crew members, makeup artists–all those people are able to be helped from this fund. So, as you know, every week we’re asking you to donate. Keep supporting all of us on strike.

Ashley Ray [00:54:42] So thank you so, so much. Punkie, is there anything else?

Punkie Johnson [00:54:45] Yo, man, I just appreciate the audience. I appreciate the listeners. It takes one fan. Even if I get one fan out of this, I appreciate you, and I appreciate your platform for me to be here. So, thank you very much.

Ashley Ray [00:54:58] Oh my gosh. Thank you. This was so fun. You have really helped my dating life right now. And I think a lot of listeners out there are going to be helped with this. So, thank you so much for listening. And we’ll be back next week with another episode. TV, I Say with Ashley Ray is an Earwolf production made by me, Ashley Ray-Harris. It’s engineered by Abby Aguilar, produced by Scott Sonne, executive produced by Amelia Chappelow. And our original theme song is by RaFia. It means so much to me if you go rate, review, subscribe. Follow TV, I Say. Let us know what you think and tell your friends. Share with your Golden Girls. Tell your Boys. If you love my TV recommendations, let everyone you know know. For special TV Club members, join my Patreon.